Wednesday, October 2, 2013

14 Ways the Denver Broncos/Jacksonville Jaguars Game Can Become Competitive

In a couple weeks we will be subject to what is likely going to be the worst game of professional football every played. It will be reminiscent of many of the top college powerhouses playing lowly FCS teams; the kind of game that is so lopsided even fans of the winning team just want it to be over when the fourth quarter beings.

I'm talking about the Denver Broncos/Jacksonville Jaguars game of course.

"I have to play Jacksonville? Can I throw with my feet?"

So far the game is setting a record for the biggest point spread in NFL history--28 points. With the way that Peyton Manning is liking on all cylinders with his offense its almost surprising it is not bigger. Heck, after the Broncos handle the Cowboys and their tough defense it probably will be.

That just sucks. You would think that the talent gap in the NFL would not be so big, but in this case it is. This game is going to suck--unless we can figure out some way to make it more competitive (or at least fun) to watch.

And I've got a few ideas....

  1. Denver needs to resign Tim Tebow for one game. That way when he leads Denver to victory the Jaguars will be convinced signing the popular QB is a good idea. 
  2. Peyton Manning should have to throw with his left rather than his right.
  3. Wes Welker and the rest of the Broncos receiving corps need to play offensive line.
  4. Peyton should be the all-time QB and play for both teams.
  5. Denver players should be forced to go both ways.
  6. Every time Denver scores the offense has to do a keg stand; one second for every point.
  7. Peyton could play with no offensive line.
  8. Jacksonville could be allowed to drive to the end zone.
  9. The teams switch wide receivers.
  10. The Jaguars mascot will be allowed to shoot Broncos players at random with a paintball gun throughout the game.
  11. Denver players will have to answer trivia questions about the all-time greatest Jaguars (whoever they are) before they can score.
  12. Jacksonville doesn't have to tackle anyone; two-hand touch is allowed.
  13. All Denver offensive weapons can only advance the ball by jumping in a potato sack or with one leg tied to another player.
  14. For every completed pass the Jaguars get a point.




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